Our 3 1/2 year old son, Matthew, is a very picky eater. He literally only eats Yogurt, goldfish crackers, a few different variety of cookies, milk and juice, and that's it! He used to eat all kinds of food. Then I got pregnant with our daughter and he stopped. I don't know why? We didn't do anything different. We kept feeding him what we were eating.
I don't know how to introduce new foods to him, or how to get him to take a bit of them? Bribing him might work, but I doubt it, he is very strong willed and stubborn. I read an article HERE on Single Dad Life that says not to bribe him. But Matthew won't put anything in his mouth that he doesn't like, not even one bite.
If anyone has any advice, please let me know, I would really like some suggestions on this. It has been suggested that Matthew might be Autistic or have Aspergers, but he hasn't been diagnosed, yet.
I just don't know what to do or what to try, or how to do it? Any advice would be helpful. Thank you.
I have some advice but you might not like it. I have NEVER had a picky eater in my house, because I won't allow it. I have three children and three step children.
ReplyDeleteThe only picky type eaters in my house have been my step kids because I have not raised them. In my house you eat your dinner, you eat what is on your plate and it does not matter if you like it or not.
I give my children appropriate portions and they have to eat them. If they don't like them then they still have to try it one bite for each year of age. So if you are two years old you have to take two bites, three years old three bites and so on until they are five. I only have a five bite rule after that. This is a good rule because when they are served something they should be polite and try it. Also kids can decide they don't like it just based on its looks or by it's name and never taste it.
Then when they are old enough to fill their own plates they eat what they put on their plates, or five bites at least. If you don't eat every thing then you don't get any more.
This is a good rule for two reasons, I make bread, salad, green beans, and chicken breasts. My son does not like green beans so much so he only takes a little of it, but he still has to eat some of it. So he gets a balanced meal. My step daughters would eat four chicken breasts a each if I let them and not eat the salad on their plate. I cannot afford to feed everyone four chicken breasts and it is not good for them to just eat meat.
If you have not raised your children with this rule it is hard for them to adjust to it. But they do. My step daughters have tried and discovered millions of foods they just turned their noses up to before.
If you don't eat all your dinner you don't get your drink, or any snacks. Picky eaters have to wait until next meal in my house. They will be a bit hungry but they won't starve. It is hard to see a three year old not eat anything really for a day, but they will eat when they are hungry and they will eat what you give them if that is all their choices.
I hope that helps, I know it is hard, but you have to be firm.
I'm going through the same thing. My son has been like that for a few years but when he was smaller he would eat anything! Maybe I will learn something too.
ReplyDeleteThank you for the advice savingyourgreen. We are going to have to start doing that. I just hate that he doesn't eat hardly anything. Our ped. was worried about him being anemic, and now we are too. So it's time to nip it in the bud and start trying to get him to eat with us.
ReplyDeleteOur son went through a stage where he ate only raisins, bananas, pretzels (only the twisted small ones) and chocolate milk. He's nearly 17 and eats much better now. We didn't pressure him or make food an argument in front of him. (My hubby was/is an extremely picky eater.) We didn't bribe or fight with him. We encouraged him to take one "thank you" bite of each food to show he was thankful that he had food to eat. We told him it was okay for him not to like it, but he did need to swallow it. This is a rule we continue even as our youngest is nearly a teen too. We also made his "I'll only eat..." foods in short supply so he'd be hungry at meal times. At 3 1/2 your son may enjoy picking out some healthy snacks at the store. We had all our kids convinced that 100% real fruit leather was a candy bar and it is a great "treat" that travels well. Just because a child is strong willed or refuses to eat does not mean that he has some form of Autism. It is common for children to go through stages that they are more resistant to authority, and especially common when they begin to discover they have the ability to say "no" and express what they "want". If you are concerned that your son does have a medical condition, you should discuss it with his pediatrician. Blessings.
ReplyDeleteYikes- as a ubber picky eater myself.. I will tell you that forcing a kid is horrible. I think it made my food issues way worse. My mom made a meal and I had to dish it up myself. She made me eat a little bit of two things, but I also wasn't allowed to make myself a sandwich or whatever. It was eat something she made or nothing at all. But Olivia is a picky eater and I don't force the issue. If she only eats chicken and no veggies- I'm just happy she ate something. But I will never make her something special or let her eat something for a meal that wasn't served. It's just our rule but I certainly don't force her to eat what is on her plate.
ReplyDeleteIf you are concerned about him being anemic then you can start sneaking other foods into the foods he does eat. I make a mean pizza with spinach on top, Spaghetti sauce, sloppy joe sauce and things like that are really easy to sneak spinach, and zucchini into. Zucchini fries are fun, or even sweet potato. Since your son is almost four you can have him help you in the kitchen. If he helps prepare the meal he might be more apt to eat some of it. I would make a big deal about how yummy whatever he made was and how everyone should try it.
ReplyDeleteI like the thank you bite rule ElizaBeth posted. The only thing I would make it up to five bites per year. Since your son is new at it you could start with one bite and work your way up.
My oldest son thought for years that he hated zucchini but loved the "fried cucumbers" I made every summer. He fooled himself he thought the zucchini was cucumbers and I just let him think it so he would eat it. He loved it but swore he hated zucchini.
My youngest son just turned four this December and he has a hyper level that my other children never had. When this kid gets some processed food, red dye #40 or Yellow dye #6 in him I can really tell because he is going 90 mph and I can hardly keep my hair from falling out it drives me so crazy. So I started paying close attention and doing some research on foods that he was eating. The red #40 and yellow #6 was a big problem and caused some children to have a reaction.
If you can get your son back into a eating habit you should really consider good foods as that might have a real effect on his behavior. I know when I switched his diet it really made a difference.
In my first comment I may seem harsh, but I am really a mom that wants her kids to have a healthy diet. My oldest daughter is now 21 and a really healthy eater. I am not a clean your plate kinda mom but kids need to try foods or they will never know if they like it. Also their tastes continue to change as they grow, so if they keep having to try some food they might just like it the next time you make it. It is probably just a stage where they are testing their boundaries but you are the adult and your job is to raise them healthy and happy so you have to set clear rules.
I love your blog!!! I am now a follower, looking forward to reading!
ReplyDeleteCome on over and check us out if you want.
Megan
www.thegreatletdown.com
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I can't really offer advice. My son is almost 2, and refuses to chew any foods. And doesn't want to eat any soft foods either. Our pediatrician told us to only offer finger foods that he would need to chew, and let him starve himself if he so chose. But that seems so harsh.
ReplyDeleteWe are doing a modified version. He gets served meals with us. His breakfast is a milk/yogurt/banana shake with a crushed vitamin, which I know he will eat. Then finger foods for lunch and a smaller version of our supper. Milk before bed ensures he is not starving and waking me up all night.
He is getting better at putting foods in his mouth and licking/sucking them. But still no chewing. Good luck with your son!
Have you spoken to your sons Doctor? Our daughter has Down Syndrome and Autistic tendencies, and she is a picky eater. I know all children can be stubborn, but our daughter is so willful that she will not eat something if she does not want to. I could make her sit at the dining room table forever and she's still not going to do it. Her Doctor gave us the advice of just letting her eat what she wants. In our case it is spagetthi that I sneak cooked yams or spinach in the sauce, or some kind of carb with lots of catsup for dipping. The thing is she is now 14, and begining try some new things. As long as the Doctor says your son is healthy, be happy at least he is eating yogurt. Good luck!
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